Of all the painful aspects of a divorce, nothing weighs more heavily on a parent’s heart than the well-being of their children. You’re worried about how they’ll cope with the changes, how you’ll create a new sense of normalcy, and, most of all, how you’ll continue to be the parent they need. The legal terms “custody” and “visitation” can feel cold and clinical, but at their core, they are about one thing: ensuring your children have a stable, loving, and supportive relationship with both of their parents.
In Virginia, the law is clear that your children’s best interests are the top priority. This guide will help you understand how child custody and visitation are determined in Virginia, so you can advocate for an arrangement that allows your children to thrive.
The “Best Interests of the Child” Standard
In any custody or visitation case, a Virginia court’s primary focus is the “best interests of the child.” This is not just a vague guideline; it’s a legal standard that requires the court to consider a specific set of factors. According to Virginia Code § 20-124.3, these factors include the age and health of the child, the relationship each parent has with the child, each parent’s ability to meet the child’s needs, and the child’s preference, if they are of a reasonable age and maturity.
The court does not give preference to either parent based on gender; instead, it looks at which parent has been the primary caregiver and is best equipped to provide a stable and nurturing environment.
Understanding the Different Types of Custody
Custody in Virginia is divided into two categories: legal custody and physical custody. It’s important to understand the difference between them.
| Type of Custody | What It Means | Common Arrangements |
|---|---|---|
| Legal Custody | The right to make major decisions about your child’s life, including their education, healthcare, and religious upbringing. | Joint Legal Custody: Both parents share the decision-making authority. This is the most common arrangement in Virginia. |
| Physical Custody | Where the child lives on a day-to-day basis. | Sole Physical Custody: The child lives with one parent, and the other parent has visitation. Joint Physical Custody: The child spends significant time with both parents. This does not necessarily mean a 50/50 split. |
Three Keys to Creating a Successful Parenting Plan
A parenting plan is a detailed roadmap for how you and your ex will co-parent. A well-drafted plan can prevent future conflicts and provide the consistency your children need. Here are three keys to creating a successful plan.
1. Be Specific and Detailed.
Don’t leave things open to interpretation. Your parenting plan should clearly outline the regular custody schedule, as well as schedules for holidays, summer vacation, and other special occasions. It should also specify how you’ll handle transportation, communication, and decision-making.
The more detailed the plan, the less room there is for disagreement down the road.
2. Put Your Children’s Needs First.
It’s easy to get caught up in what you want, but the focus of the parenting plan should always be on what’s best for your children. Consider their ages, their school schedules, their extracurricular activities, and their emotional needs. A plan that works for a toddler will not work for a teenager.
Be prepared to be flexible and to adapt the plan as your children grow and their needs change.
3. Work with an Experienced Attorney.
Even if you and your spouse agree on most things, it’s crucial to have an experienced family law attorney draft or review your parenting plan. An attorney can ensure the plan is legally sound, comprehensive, and protects your parental rights. They can also help you anticipate potential future issues and address them in the plan.
Our compassionate legal team has extensive experience in crafting parenting plans that work for families. For more information, visit our child custody and visitation page.
Your Children Deserve Two Loving Parents
Divorce is a difficult transition for children, but it does not have to be a destructive one. By focusing on their best interests, communicating respectfully with your ex, and creating a stable and predictable environment, you can help your children navigate this change with resilience and strength. Your marriage may be ending, but your role as a parent is forever.
If you’re facing a custody or visitation issue in Virginia, we’re here to help you protect your relationship with your children. Contact us or call our Fairfax Divorce Lawyer Now at 703-223-5295 to schedule a confidential consultation.
Frequently Asked Questions (Q&A)
Q: Can my child decide which parent they want to live with?
A: The court will consider a child’s preference if the child is of a reasonable age and maturity. However, the child’s preference is just one of many factors the court will consider. The judge will make the final decision based on the child’s overall best interests.
Q: What if my ex is not following the custody order?
A: A custody order is a legally binding court order. If your ex is violating the order, you can file a motion with the court to enforce it. It’s important to document all violations and consult with an attorney to understand your options.
Q: Can I move out of state with my child?
A: Relocating with a child is a complex legal issue. If you have a custody order in place, you will likely need the other parent’s consent or a court order to move. The court will consider whether the move is in the child’s best interest. It is crucial to consult with an attorney before making any plans to relocate.
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